We picked up on that. "OK. You look very nice today," we told her. "You're being a complimentarian."
Being a what? Admittedly, that's a word we'd never heard until the last couple of weeks, much less used. The Southern Baptists have had an in-house debate for about a year about "complementarianism" - the religious idea that males and females have different roles which complement each other.
But did you notice how we changed the spelling in our first quote? We decided to endorse the practice of complimenting (with an I) other people. This is something both males and females can do - even in the middle of a tense poker game.
An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up. - Proverbs 12:25
It can be as simple as complimenting an opponent on a well-played hand. Or you can try what we've done recently - complimenting a player wearing an out-of-the-ordinary hat.
Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. - Proverbs 16:24
But we'd put a small warning on this habit. Don't go over the top from complementarian to flatterer - using words of praise that you really don't mean.
A lying tongue hates those it hurts, and a flattering mouth works ruin. - Proverbs 26:26
To put it another way: look for the good in others, as you look for good cards to play. It could make your next poker game more of a game, and less of a grind.
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