After the Storm

Professional poker players are known for keeping their cool during a game.  But of course, the ones who don't make for "great television" -- in the same way outlandish actions are more likely to appear on the evening news than ordinary trips to dinner.

The shouting match at our poker table this week over a misdealt card didn't have to happen.  Several people could have handled things much better. For instance....


1. The woman who lost the big hand vented all the way across the table at the dealer.  Jesus taught a better approach:

If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you.  If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. - Matthew 18:15

Jesus went on to add a second step you should take, before getting everyone else (in His example "the church") involved -- getting "one or two others" to hear the dispute (verses 16-17).


2. The dealer verbally apologized.  That's good.  But he did it on the loudness level of the complainer, almost trying to shout her down.  That's not so good.

A soft answer turns away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. - Proverbs 15:1 (KJV)

In this case, the upset woman probably never would have heard a quiet apology which interrupted her.  So our approach probably would have been to let the woman speak her piece -- and apologize quietly once she was finished.


3.  The Tournament Director heard the argument -- but when he walked over, he told everyone involved to settle it among themselves.  We're not sure if he had anything better to do, but he missed an opportunity:

Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. - Romans 14:19

Or as Jesus put it: "Blessed are the peacemakers" (Matthew 5:9).  Many approaches could have been used to bring peace to this argument.  Perhaps he could have let each party speak their piece uninterrupted, then offering guidance.  (If you have a better idea, please leave a comment.)


Someone noted to us during a break this shouting match occurred in a "free poker" game.  Yes, first-place prize money was at stake -- but nowhere close to the millions of dollars at the World Series of Poker Main Event.  So was the loud argument really worth it?  The Bible offers a much better idea:

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.  Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. - Ephesians 4:31-32

P.S. Neither party in the argument made it to the final table.  We did -- along with a woman who admitted she intentionally walked away from the table during the spat so she wouldn't have her "blood boil."  Is there a lesson there for all of us?