When In Doubt, Shove 'em Out

Sometime online poker seems like a theatre of the absurd. Consider what happened to us at a National League of Poker tournament this afternoon:

BLINDS: 15/30

IN THE POCKET: A-K offsuit

We've drawn the Big Blind for the first hand of the tournament. The table is full. Everyone has 1,000 chips. Yet three seats ahead of us, a player goes all-in before the flop. This seems to happen all the time at NLOP, save for the big-money championships.

Then a second player calls, going all-in. Our hand simply isn't foldable, so we dare to join them. When we see the cards, we feel good about our chances. The first player to push has 10-4 of spades -- clearly someone making a ridiculous bluff, hoping to steal blinds (we guess). The second player has A-Q; his call was quite understandable.

ON THE FLOP: 10-7-9

Aw, c'mon! The donkey is in the lead.

ON THE TURN: 10

Sigh. The river card doesn't matter. One man's donkey is another person's stinkin' genius. We finish next to last; the A-Q loser is the only player below us.

But NLOP is "no-limit" hold 'em, after all. Anyone can push at any time, with anything. Some call it poker. It strikes us more as sumo wrestling.